


Love, Stiles (or, "To All The Gays I've Loved Before)

by Thomaddicted



Series: Sterek Valentines Week 2021 [3]
Category: Sterek - Fandom, Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 08:54:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29329626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thomaddicted/pseuds/Thomaddicted
Summary: Stiles Stilinski has been in love with Derek Hale most of his life. He's even gotten brave enough to tell Derek exactly how he feels, well, on paper anyway.Does Stiles have what it takes to admit his true feels and risk exile and ridicule, or will he be like most queer teens and secretly pine away as a friend to his crush, silently?In a world where love is only for the bold, and the straight, what is a young queer boy to do when happily ever after looks like it might be happily NEVER after?A teen love movie that's as gay as Christmas and as angst ridden as ever, join Freshman Stiles and Junior Derek, and the impossible mating dance of High School boys who are bad at feelings.
Relationships: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski
Series: Sterek Valentines Week 2021 [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2150535
Comments: 15
Kudos: 83
Collections: Sterek Valentine Week





	Love, Stiles (or, "To All The Gays I've Loved Before)

**Author's Note:**

> Third in the series for Sterek Valentine Week, 2021
> 
> Prompt: Secret Crush  
> Rating: PG13 (Strong Language, Adult situations,)

Cut, cut, cut. 

Stiles’ little hands worked the saftey scissors into the red construction paper, trying to carve it into the shape of a heart. The red paper is folded in half, and Stiles cuts along the stencil that he’s drawn on the paper. 

Cut, cut, cut. 

Stiles’ little pink tongue is sticking out the corner of his mouth, a mark of his concentration. This is the fifth heart he has cut out, cause the other ones had come out too crooked and sloppy. This one has to be perfect, because it’s going to someone very special. 

Stiles can’t explain why he likes the kid so much. He met Derek Hale a year ago when he started school, and the older boy was so nice to him, and he was… very cute. 

Stiles is 8 and understands that he finds another boy cute. It’s a big deal, but he knows it’s not something people understand. Stiles just knows that Derek makes his heart happy when he sees him smile. 

Stiles takes a black crayon, and draws two stick figures on the paper, one a little bigger than the other. He can't wait for Valentine's Day to come.

Stiles arrives at school for his first day of Freshman year in high school. He is sitting in homeroom next to his best friend in the whole world, Scott McCall, who keeps doodling the name “Allison” over and over again in his notebook. 

“Dude.” Stiles grumbles. “It’s literally the first day of school.” 

Scott just sighs dreamily and draws a heart around the name. It’s lopsided, and sparks an uneasy feeling inside of Stiles. “She’s the one, Stiles. She’s the one I’m gonna marry.” 

Stiles rolls his eyes and opens his textbook and pretends to find something else to focus on. 

The day is a slog until he gets to math class and takes a seat. He flops down unceremoniously and pulls out a notebook for the class. He watches the other students from various grades fill in, and scribbles onto the cover of the notebook: “Geometry 201”. 

“Okay class,” The teacher speaks, “When I call your name, please say ‘here’, or ‘present’.” 

The teacher calls through the list of people, and when he gets through the Gs, he calls out “Hale, Derek.” 

Stiles immediately looks up from his notebook. 

“Hale, Derek.” Mr. Shane announced again. “Going once, going twice…” 

“Here.” A guy practically skids into the room. 

“Hale, Derek?” Mr. Shane looks the guy over. “Class begins at second bell, right after lunch.” 

“Sorry.” Derek scans the room looking for an empty desk. Stiles flushes when he sees there’s one right in front of him. For a second, Derek’s eyes lock with Stiles, and something sparks there.

“Very well, just take an open seat.” The teacher gestured to the classroom. Of course, there was only one open seat, and Derek slid into it, quietly. 

Stiles tries to ignore the hunky new arrival sitting a seat in front of him. Stiles takes a moment to register the clean cut hairline, the smoothness of the back of Derek’s neck. 

“Oh… geez…” Mr. Shane’s eyes practically cross as he looks at the attendance book. “Stilinski…” 

“Stiles.” Stiles raises his hand, “Stiles Stilinski.” 

The teacher nods at Stiles, and scribbles a note in his book, and Stiles almost misses the way Derek glances off to the side, as he tries to look behind himself. Stiles looks up for a moment, but Derek looks away again, watching the front of the class, intently. 

Stiles is grateful for the distraction math class brings, and he’s been dreading the last class of the day, P.E. Being the first day, Stiles knows that they won’t have to do anything, Freshmen get assigned their locks, and clothes, and Stiles is almost relieved to see that Scott has P.E. this period too. 

After getting their clothes and locks assigned, Scott decides to join in on a pickup game of basketball with some of the other freshmen boys. Stiles knows that coordination is not his strong suit, and instead opts to sit on the bleachers. His mind rolls back some years, back to the way back. When he was just a stupid little kid with a crush on a boy a couple of years older than him.

Stiles remembers, with a rush of unease, that day before Valentine’s Day when he’s 8. In his backpack there is a Valentine for Derek Hale, a boy in an upper grade that he knows from recess. Stiles wants to give Derek the Valentine because tomorrow is Valentines’ day and he likes Derek, because Derek makes him feel happy inside when they play on the playground together. Stiles knows the other boys think that he is weird, but Derek never makes Stiles feels that way. 

Stiles sees Derek walking down the hall, and Stiles follows him, digging into his backpack and pulling out the red construction paper heart. Derek is too far ahead to call, so Stiles just follows the older boy until they reach the playground. Stiles stops when he sees Derek meet a girl at the swing set. 

Derek blushes and waves hello to her, before she leans forward, giving him a peck on the lips as a greeting. Stiles watches as this girl gets to do something that Stiles knows he wants to do, but also growing up in a small town like Beacon Hills, knows it’s something that he’s not supposed to do, and that’s kiss another boy. But he wants to kiss another boy, and he wants that boy to be Derek Hale. 

Stiles comes to the conclusion, very early on, watching Derek kiss this girl, that Stiles will never get to be that girl. A big disappointment washes over Stiles, and as he watches Derek push the girl as she sits on the swings, Stiles lets his Valentine fall out of his hands, onto the floor of the playground. He hates Valentine's Day. 

“Hey.” 

Stiles looks up, and finds Scott looking up at him on the bleachers. “What’s wrong Stiles? Period’s been over for ten minutes.” 

Stiles just shakes his head. He can’t wait for this year to be over.

It’s two months into classes when Stiles gets the shock of his life. Derek comes into class, approaches his desk, sits down, and immediately turns to Stiles. “Hey.” Derek’s voice is surprisingly polite and very sincere, which makes Stiles instantly cautious. “Can I ask you… something?” 

Stiles looks both wary, but also hopeful. He's seen some porn that starts this way. He's also seen horror movies that start this way. “Sure.” 

Derek looks down at Stiles' desk top, and Stiles can see the tips of Derek's ears going hot pink. “I’m having a lot of trouble with this class. I can’t get any of it right, and if my GPA isn’t up soon, I won’t be able to play this coming season." Derek looks up finally, his eyes catching Stiles'. "Can you help me?” 

Stiles blinks as the stares into Derek's eyes. He’s never been THIS close to Derek. So close, he can smell the scent of Derek, a musky, heady scent, mixed with the product he wears in his hair, and a hint of mint on Derek's breath. Stiles cannot stop staring, close enough to see the flecks of gold sprayed through Derek’s hazel and emerald green eyes. Derek looks even more scared and nervous than Stiles does, and it makes Stiles’ heart flutter a bit. 

“Sure.” Stiles says, licking his lips. They feel dry as a desert, his tongue like sandpaper as it scrapes over the top and bottom of his cupid’s bow mouth. “I’ll tutor you. No problem.” 

Derek smiles and nods. “Thanks. Can you make it over to my house today?” 

Stiles nods. “Sure.” 

At 6pm, Stiles is at Derek’s house. It's a beautiful two story home with a large lawn in the nicer part of Beacon Hills. It's near the town's edge near the woods, the tall trees surrounding the building make for a stunning backdrop. Stiles once again recall his porno/horror parallel, and decides if he's gonna die, he better get to going. He climbs the stairs leading to the porch, which is beautiful, with a large bench swing on it, and some plants in large white planters on either side. The air smells of lavender and pine.

Stiles takes a breath, and knocks on the door, trying to not chew up his lips with nerves. Tries not to think of the fact that he's standing on the porch of his crush's home in the late afternoon. 

The door to the Hale house opens, and Stiles feels his heart fall into his gut, down to his feet, the just to the base of his throat. Get it together, Stiles, he scolds himself.

A small girl with long black hair answers the door and regards Stiles with curiosity. “Hi.” She chirps. “I’m Cora.” 

Stiles grins at the younger girl. “Hello. I’m Stiles. I’m looking for Derek.” 

The door opens further, and Derek appears behind little Cora, scooping her up to her delighted squeal. 

“Derek! Your friend is here!” The girl giggles as Stiles spins her around. 

“I can see that Cora-dora.” Derek says, then turns and grins at Stiles. “Hey.” 

Derek is wearing a grey tank top that clings to his muscled torso underneath a dark blue over shirt, completely unbuttoned. He's wearing black jeans, and is barefoot, despite the cold weather. He looks fresh and clean, and Stiles starts to think this was in fact the worst idea in the history of worse ideas.

“Hey.” Stiles grins back. “Great welcoming committee.” Stiles gestures to Cora, winking at her as she clings to Derek.

Derek grinned. “Yeah. We haven’t needed a guard dog in years.” 

“Derek, be nice.” A woman stood behind Derek, her dark hair framing a smiling face. 

Stiles nodded and grinned, as Derek let his little sister down and watched her scramble away, giggling. Derek turns to the woman, and gestures to the new arrival. 

“Mom, this is Stiles. He’s here to help me with my math.” 

Stiles approached Talia, his hand extended. “Hello Mrs. Hale, it’s lovely to meet you.” 

Talia arched an eyebrow and took Stiles’ hand. “Stiles, welcome. So nice to meet you.”

Looking at Derek, she grinned, before turning back to smiles and offering him a nod of approval. “Please, make yourself at home.” 

"Thank you." Stiles said, as Talia left them in the hall. Derek steered Stiles to the dining room table where he had his books set up and notebook out. Stiles took the seat to Derek’s right. “Okay.” Stiles looked at the book. “Where do you need the most help?” 

Stiles helped Derek along, and was pleased to see Derek retained what Stiles taught him. It wasn't as bad as Stiles thought it would be, in fact, Derek seemed to do a lot better when Stiles was explaining it to him. Every time Derek got something right, he'd chuckle warmly and look at Stiles with appreciation, and Stiles leaned up against the table and made sure to hide any evidence of his own appreciation, taking great care to not get TOO close to Derek. That part was it's own torture because Stiles wanted nothing more but to be right next to him, but he backed off as much as he was able. Somehow, it felt like he was taking advantage of Derek, when he should be helping him. Not that Derek seemed to mind. In between working on problems, they chatted a bit about themselves as well.

After an hour and a half of working and talking, they stopped for a break. Talia Hale appeared with some cookies and milk, and Stiles felt both charmed and saddened, thinking of how much he missed his late mother, and how this was exactly the kind of thing she would have done. Derek seemed to be embarrassed but that somehow only made Stiles like him more. Not that he would dare share that thought with Derek.

“Thank you for the help on this.” Derek said, from around a mouthful of chocolate chip cookie. Stiles grinned and shook his head. “No problem at all, dude. I’m glad I could help.” 

From the corner of his eye, Stiles spied little Cora Hale peeking around the corner into the kitchen, giggling as she caught sight of the two boys. Stiles grinned at her, sending her into a peal of laughter. 

“Sorry about that.” Derek frowned at Cora, who scurried away. “Sometimes having little siblings is the worst.” 

“Wouldn’t know.” Stiles said, sipping his milk. “I’m an only child. Sometimes it’s cool.” Stiles says, noticing the way Derek watched him. “Sometimes it’s…” 

“What?” Derek asked. 

Stiles looked at the textbook. “Nothing.” He pointed at one of the problems. “Did you get the formula on this?” Stiles tapped the equation. 

“Yeah.” Derek said, wiping his mouth. 

“How’d that go again?” Stiles asked, listening to Derek explain the formula, making sure he got it all. 

Leaving the Hale house, Stiles and Derek talked on the patio. “You seem to have got everything.” 

Derek nodded. “I hope so. My place on the team is at stake here.” 

“Oh?” Stiles responded, his eyebrows raised in surprise. 

“Yeah.” Derek rubbed the back of his neck. “My GPA sucks cause of this class. If it drops below 2.5, then I can’t play, and as the captain of the Varsity team, that would be bad.” 

“Oh.” Stiles answered again.

“So… I really appreciate this.” Derek said, his cheeks beginning to warm with color in the cooler fall air. "Thank you." Derek said, his voice low and sincere. 

“My pleasure.” Stiles said, heading over to his bike. He pulled up the kickstand and glanced back at Derek. Stiles caught sight of Cora in the window, and waved at her, watching as she giggled again, and disappeared behind the curtain. 

Preseason games were going to start soon, and Stiles continued to help Derek, week after week. Sometimes, just for kicks, Stiles would sit in the bleachers after 6th period, and watch as Derek and the team played basketball. Stiles often envied the jocks their grace and athleticism, wondering what it was like to have coordination. Every now at then, Derek would glace up at Stiles and grin, or maybe cock his head in greeting. Sometimes Derek would be a well oiled machine on the court, all fluid moves, and sleek muscles. Other times, he was a goofball, teasing the other guys, sometimes even dancing in place as one of the guys took it to the hoop. Stiles watched Derek, both loving the way he moved, and hating how sexy Derek looked while he played on the court. Worse was when Derek would pull up the hem of his shirt, wiping his sweaty brow, inadvertently showing off his lean six pack abs. 

Thinking back, Stiles realizes that he’s never really gotten over his boyhood crush on Derek. It even followed him into the 5th grade. In middle school, Stiles remembers being more enamored with Derek. He’s in the sixth grade and Derek is in the eighth, and Stiles feels like he might die anytime he sees Derek walking down the hall, talking with whatever buddies he’s with that day. Stiles spends a lot of time on his own until he meets Scott, but no matter whom Stiles is around, he just thinks of Derek. Again, Stiles knows that boys are supposed to like girls, and Stiles DOES, but not as much as he likes Derek. 

Stiles is 11. It’s February, and Stiles is nervous. He has the little red card in front of him, and his pen held in his warm, sweaty hand, trying to think what he should write. The cheer squad is selling candy grams for students, and Stiles has bought one for Derek, to try and tell him how he feels. The candy grams can either be signed or anonymous, and that suits Stiles just fine, since he’s not signing his name. 

Stiles scribbles a quick note on the card, before folding it and jamming it into the little cardboard box where the completed grams go. Stiles is out of breath and for a moment, wants to jam his hand back in there and pull it out, but then remembers, it’s fine. His name isn’t on it, so Derek will never know it’s him. 

On Valentine’s Day, Stiles goes through the whole day, looking for, but not looking for Derek Hale. It’s the end of the day, and Stiles is putting his books in his locker, and heading out of the main hall, when he finds himself walking behind a few guys, all surrounding Derek, who has at least ten suckers in his back pocket. 

“Shit Hale, you cleaned up.” One of the guys, Stiles recognizes as Vernon Boyd, says to Derek. 

“Everyone loves a Hale.” Derek replies in a cocky manner that both amuses and annoys Stiles, who continues to walk behind them, silently. 

“So, who are all those from?” Another pal, curly haired Isaac Lahey, asks Derek, who tosses an empty lollypop stick, before pulling another one, and unwrapping it. 

“Who cares? I just pull the candies. I have no idea who they’re from.” 

That… bums Stiles out. Not that Stiles signed his name to his, but he did feel bummed that Derek obviously didn’t read Stiles’ brief message to him. 

Not that it mattered. Stiles thought about it, cause what was he going to do if Derek Hale knew that Stiles liked him like that. Probably get beat up, Stiles thinks. Probably get beat up, badly. Just because he has a crush on this guy. 

Stiles is actually relieved the next year when Derek is gone, and he can be a normal disaster in peace. Until high school, that is.

Stiles doesn’t realize that the session is over, until he feels his leg being shaken. 

“Hello in there.” 

Coming to his senses, he sees Derek standing on the bleachers in front of him, one hand on Stiles’ foot, shaking it to get the daydreamer’s attention. 

“Oh. Hey.” Stiles says. It takes Stiles a moment to place himself. Derek smiles at Stiles, then pulls his sweat soaked shirt from his body. Stiles feels his heart flutter it’s way into his throat and his own pits start to get sweaty from the sight in front of him. Derek reaches into his bag, and pulls out a clean shirt, and slips into that, tugging it down those amazing abs. 

“So, how was I?” Derek asks. Stiles takes a breath and blinks. 

“Fine. Fine. Great. Good game.” 

Derek smiles at Stiles. “You weren’t even paying attention, were you?” 

“I was too.” Stiles scoffs. “You threw the ball and it made it into the hoop. Good job.” 

Derek chuckled, and shouldered his bag. “Need a ride home?” 

Stiles felt himself heat up. “Uhhhh. Sure?” 

Getting up from the bleachers, Stiles placed his bookbag over his crotch, and carefully walked down the bleachers, praying to whatever gods were responsible for keeping awkward bisexual disasters from tumbling down flights of stairs that he would not fall down. 

Derek unlocked the door of his beat up little Toyota, a gift for his 16th birthday last Christmas. Stiles got in and felt a giddy little thrill as Derek slid into the driver’s seat. 

Stiles didn’t live too far from the school, but the nights got here sooner in the winter, and by the time Derek pulled up to Stiles’ house, the sun had completely set. 

“Thank you.” Stiles said, getting out of the car. 

“Welcome.” Derek replied, tongue worrying over his lips. “Stiles?” 

“Yeah?” Stiles asked, leaning down, looking into the car, on hand on the door, the other on the roof of the car. 

“Do you think you can come over again, maybe this weekend?” Derek asked. “The final is coming up soon and… I just… I wanna be ready.” 

Stiles nodded. “Sure. Just name the time.” 

Stiles feels a great sense of pride when Derek gets back his final, with a great big A- on it, and the words, “Good Work” scribbled across it. Derek is beaming, and Stiles could not be prouder of him. 

Stiles pauses in front of the table where the senior cheerleaders are fundraising by selling candy grams, this time for Christmas, with candy canes as the treat. Stiles wonders if he should, then thinks, maybe not. He doesn’t want to ruin what feels like a friendship with his feelings. Still, it would be a nice thank you to Derek. Not that Stiles needs to thank Derek. Stiles sighs and picks one up, paying for it, then just firing off a polite “Happy Howlidays, Stiles” because their school mascot is a wolf, and Stiles enjoys a quality pun or reference. He pays for two candy canes and drops the gram in the mailbox, feeling great about the whole thing. 

The holidays come and school is out, so Stiles spends a lot of time playing video games with Scott, who can’t stop talking about Allison. Stiles doesn’t mind, since half the time he zones out, thinking about Derek. Stiles wonders if maybe he should get something for Derek’s birthday, but… that might feel out of place. He wants to, but what would he even give him? What would happen if Stiles just showed up out of the blue at Derek's with a gift? Would Derek be embarrassed? Stiles easily talks himself out of it, as he's been doing most of the last semester, wondering if he was going crazy. Surely he can't be acting like he normally does. 

Stiles’ dad, Sheriff John Stilinski has noticed this, and carefully breaches the subject one night when they are having dinner together. Stiles has been actually allowing things like meat and butter into the dishes, which immediately tips John off that something is different concerning his teenage son. Since his mother’s death when Stiles was 6, Stiles started cooking and caring for his Dad, making sure they ate as healthy as they could. Stiles letting John have a cheeseburger for dinner (even if it’s alongside a green salad), is off brand for him. 

“Everything going well, Stiles?” John asks, savoring the flavor of the seasoned hamburger in his mouth. 

Stiles nods. “Yeah. Just anxious for school to start again.” 

“Really?” John asked. “That’s new. You’re usually dragging your feet most times. What makes it different this year?” 

Stiles stopped his chewing, his mouth very dry all of a sudden. He tried to swallow the bite in his mouth, drinking a bit of water to help it along. The lingering silence felt profound. “I just… things are easier than I expected them to be.” Which isn’t a lie, Stiles thinks, but fails to add “because my crush is turning into my friend and that’s both wonderful and painful all at once.” 

“Well, that’s good. I’m glad for you.” John says. “You know.” He clears his throat. “If you run into any trouble or anything… you know you can talk to me, right?” 

Stiles looks into his dad’s eyes. He feels both very exposed, but also, like a creep cause he KNOWS he can talk to his dad, but he sure as shit isn’t going to be bringing up the affects that being buds with Derek Hale is having on him, especially to Stiles’ bedsheets. 

“I know.” Stiles says, and leaves it at that, overjoyed when his dad does as well.

The Spring semester starts, and Stiles is bummed that none of his classes feature Derek Hale. 

This doesn’t stop Stiles from attending the basketball games, where he gets to see Derek play his perfectly formed ass off. Stiles hasn’t seen Derek since that last day before winter break, and never knew if Derek got the candy, because all of the grams were delivered sixth period on the last day. Still, Stiles hopes Derek liked them. Stiles watches Derek do his thing on the court, and there’s a moment where the players are in a huddle, when Derek looks up and sees Stiles. Their eyes lock for a few moments before Derek quickly looks back into the huddle. No nod like before, no acknowledgement.

Breaking, the team takes the court, and Stiles notices that Derek’s playing is differently now. He’s distracted, and something is… off. Very off. Easy shots that Stiles has seen Derek make numerous times are missed, and he literally gets hit in the head with the ball at one point. 

Stiles feels like it’s his fault. Before spotting him, Derek was his usual MVP status, and now… well, now Stiles thinks he would fare better down there than Derek does. There’s a point where Derek looks back up at the stands, and his eyes find Stiles’, before Derek looks away, shaking his head. 

Stiles feels unwell, like the ground is falling out from under him. Stiles decides that he is the part of the equation that doesn’t fit, and simply decides to remove himself from the equation. Getting up, and leaving, Stiles heads for the bathroom, because he’s not sure if he’s going to piss or puke, but he doesn’t feel like doing either in front of everyone in the gym. 

After using the bathroom, his stomach contents still in place, and bladder empty, he pauses, and stops by the gym doors, peeking though the high set window in one. Derek is now sitting on the bench, looking like he’s trying to psych himself up. After a few minutes, he is back on the court, and Stiles watches as Derek becomes Derek Hale: Basketball Star again. Stiles hears the crowd cheer as he sinks a basket, and quietly walks away as Derek turns, looking at the bleachers again. 

The following week, Stiles is leaving gym class, when he bumps right into Derek Hale in the locker room. Derek looks amazing in his basketball jersey, and Stiles wants to look away, but also wants to study Derek. He settles for looking at the floor. 

“Stiles. Hey.” Derek says, flushing red. 

“Derek.” Stiles says, looking away. 

They stand there for a second, neither one speaking. 

“I should let you get to practice.” Stiles says, risking a look at Derek’s eyes. He remembers how much they mesmerized him before. Maybe one last look before… 

“Can… I need your help. Again.” Derek blurts out. Stiles’ brain short circuits. 

“My… why?” 

Derek bites his lips. “I just…. Need you to help…” He looks around the locker room. “I’m having some math problems again.” 

Stiles wishes he could say no. Maybe he will. Maybe he’ll tell Derek to take his amazing body and his beautiful eyes, and perfect hair and glorious butt, and go get bent. Instead, Stiles just nods, and says, “Sure.” 

Stiles arrives as Derek’s house a day later, after practice as Derek requested. He is greeted at the door by Cora. 

“Derek’s not here yet.” She says. Stiles feels a little panic until Papa Hale steps up to the door. 

“Hello Stiles. Derek is expecting you. He’s with my wife at the store right now. Would you like to come in?” 

Stiles nods and greets Mr. Jacob Hale with a handshake. “Thank you, Sir.” 

“Derek will be back soon. Please, make yourself at home. If you’d like to wait in his room, it’s the first door on the left, upstairs.” 

Stiles nods, and advances, climbing the stairs to Derek’s room. He doesn’t know he should be in there, but he’s also so curious that he can’t pass this up. 

Derek’s room is nice. It’s very much a boy’s room. There’s a desk against one wall, covered with books and papers and a laptop. There’s a dresser drawer with a mirror above it, and Stiles looks at all the different colognes on the top of the dresser. He picks one up and places it to his nose. It smells wonderful and he wonders why Derek doesn’t wear it more. There’s a shelf next to the mirror, and it looks like a sports shrine. Trophies and photos of Derek in little league, junior basketball. There’s even one for swimming because of course Derek would excel at every sport of which he was a part. 

Stiles moves over to Derek’s bed, and sits down. There’s a small bedside table with a lamp on it, and there’s a book on the bedside table, “The Importance of Being Earnest”. Stiles smirks. It’s definitely something that Stiles didn’t think that Derek would read. Maybe it’s for a class. 

Ten minutes later, Derek comes bursting into the room. “Stiles.” Derek says. He is panting and looks worried. Stiles immediately second guesses himself. He was right, he shouldn’t have come into Derek’s room without his permission. 

“I’m sorry…” Stiles says, getting up. 

“No!” Derek says, trying to catch his breath. “No, I’m sorry, I should have been here. The store took longer than I expected.” 

Stiles takes in Derek again. He’s wearing a shirt with the school mascot on it, the neck ripped off, and the sleeves removed. Stiles is overwhelmed by Derek’s scent and it immediately makes Stiles realizes Derek doesn’t need cologne. 

“I’m glad you’re here.” Derek says. “I…uhh….” Derek pauses. “I need help.” 

Stiles shrugs. “Sure.” 

Derek looks behind himself, then closes the bedroom door. 

Stiles is both thrilled and scared. WOULD Derek beat Stiles up with his family in the house? 

“What is it, polynomials? Fractions?” 

“Why did you leave from the game, that one day?” Derek asks. 

Stiles takes a breath. “Oh. That.” Stiles feels his legs shake a bit, so he sits down. “I just thought… I was… distracting?” Stiles feels the words fall out of his mouth. “Like, when you looked at me it looked like I was there and you didn’t want me to be there and then you started missing shots and playing poorly and I know that’s not who you are so I figured that I was the reason you were playing poorly, and so I just decided to remove myself from the equation because there was no way you were going to win so I stopped going to all the games and I thought that was best cause once I was gone you started to play better and then…” 

Derek reached over to Stiles, placing his hand on Stiles’ shoulder. “Stiles.” 

Stiles paused. Derek had never touched him before and the warmth of his hand, the welcome firmness of the older boy’s grip, soothed Stiles. 

“Stiles.” Derek’s voice is low, soothing. “I’m sorry that I made you feel that way. The truth is… I, well, really, I was nervous that you were there, but… it’s not what you think it was.” 

Derek is sweating, nervous now. “I… I wanted to talk to you because I needed to tell you something.” Derek takes a breath. “I like you, Stiles.” 

Stiles’ brain officially stops working for a moment. Derek goes pale. Stiles sees the panic in Derek’s eyes, and for a weird moment, Stiles can see himself through Derek’s eyes, even as he can see Derek through his own.

“I like you too, Derek.” Stiles voice is soft. 

Derek lets out a nervous laugh. “Like, do you like me, like me? Like, that way, like me?” 

Stiles purses his lips and nods. Vigorously. 

“Good.” Derek nods. “Good. Cause… I like you too.” Derek blinks. “Like that.” 

Drawing a breath, Derek continues. “That day at the game, I guess it kinda took me by surprise, cause I hadn’t thought… no… I mean… I thought you liked me, and I knew I liked you, but right at that moment, I realized, I’d rather be somewhere with you than out there playing that game.” 

Derek swallowed. “I just… I’d never felt that way about anyone before.” 

Stiles looked at Derek, disbelief in his eyes. “Is that why….?” 

Derek nodded. “I mean, yeah, I was nervous out there, cause…” Here Derek flushes deep red. “The guy I had a crush on was watching me play in an important game. That… that’s never happened to me before.” 

Stiles exhaled, and grinned. “Wow.” He chuckled softly. “Wow.” Stiles cautiously let his hand rest on the bed between them. 

“And yeah, I got nervous but… I didn’t want you to leave.” 

Stiles blinked, then went warm as Derek set his hand on the bed, next to Stiles. 

“I was hoping you would come back, but… that… never happened.” Derek looked away. “I thought maybe you liking me had all been in my head.” 

Stiles shook his head. “No. No, I… I’ve always liked you Derek.” 

Derek nodded. “I know.” Derek leaned in past Stiles, then opened the drawer of the bedside table. To Stiles’ great shock, there were some familiar pieces of paper on top. 

“I hadn’t been sure.” Derek said, pulling them out. “But, after the holiday candy gram, I knew, for sure, that you did.” 

Stiles flushed as Derek showed Stiles the candy grams, holiday of last year, a candy gram valentine from years ago, and an ancient valentine, a construction paper heart with two little stick figures on the front. Stiles’ eyes watered. 

Derek held them carefully. “I remember finding this on the playground, and I never knew who had made it for me. Then, when I got this one, I had a feeling it was the same person.” 

“You saved that?” Stiles asked, looking at his chicken scratch writing on the middle school valentine. 

“It was the only one I saved.” Derek admitted. “I read it dozens of times. I wasn’t sure who it could be from, until… this.” Derek held up the holiday candy gram. Stiles flicked his eyes from one to the other. The “H”s on each one were identical, as well as the “D” in “Derek”, the only difference was that Stiles signed the holiday one. 

“Oh.” Stiles flushed. “Yeah.” 

Derek carefully let his hand cover Stiles’. “Is this…okay with you?” 

"Yes." Stiles flushed. "Derek?" 

"Yeah?" Derek replied. 

"Did... you really need help in math?" 

Derek bit his bottom lip and flushed red. "I.... I did.... maybe not... as much... but.... I mean..." Derek's ears turned red. "I mean, I wanted to hang out with you, I just didn't know how to ask..." 

Stiles chuckled. This wasn't happening. Cute shit like this didn't happen to guys like him. 

"So, I mean... yeah, I didn't need as much help after, but I also didn't want to stop hanging out with you. I just... I liked you too much." Derek looked at Stiles shyly. "Do you hate me for that?" 

"No." Stiles shook his head. Derek smiled, his bunny teeth on display. "Do you still like me?" 

Stiles nodded. “Yes.” He blinked out tears that he wasn’t aware had formed in his eyes. “I never thought that you…. would like me… like that.” 

Derek smiled. “Well, I do.” Derek let his fingers curl around Stiles’. “I was thinking, if you were okay with it… maybe we could start hanging out more. Maybe on Saturdays, or Sundays. You know, outside of school.” 

“I’d like that.” Stiles smiled. “I want that.” 

Derek grinned softly. “Can I… can I kiss you?” 

Stiles nodded. “I’ve… never really kissed anyone, so…” 

Derek nodded. “If you don’t want to…” 

“No… I want to.” Stiles sighed. “Boy do I want to…” 

Derek moved in a bit, leaning forward, and Stiles did the same. They drew closer, letting their lips brush softly. Derek pressed gently, feeling himself smile as Stiles grew bolder, pressing his lips into Derek. They pulled away, grinning like a pair of goofs. 

Derek got up and put his cards away, when there was a gentle knock on the door. 

“Come in.” Derek called out, closing his drawer. 

“Hello Stiles, so glad to see you again.” Talia greeted Stiles warmly. “You’ve been missed around here.” Talia’s eyes dart to Derek quickly, before landing back on Stiles. “Would you like to stay for dinner?” 

Stiles looked at Derek, who smiled at him. Stiles couldn’t help his own smile at Derek, before looking back at Talia.

“Sure.”


End file.
